We search for our eyes to cry, to hold our tears up there,
in the starving arms of our ghosts.
We look for the origins of light, during the day, to cry...and in our fleshly
memory reminisce.
We appreciate our bones, death seated next to us, to cry...
And he hide our voice, every night because we carry our own disgrace.
We hide our gaze under the wings of stones...
And we breathe easier than the mills of heaven...we are afraid.
Our body rips in silence
Like the skeleton in the anniversary of its death
It is to cry that we search the words of the heart
In the pit of the winds that pump in our chest
In the miracle of the breeze, full of our words
Death is screwed on life
The stars back away into infinity and the ships of the sea
The voices fade to black towards nothingness
Faces distance themselves in the forest of my nostalgia
And when the emptyness is empty under the irreparable aspect
The wind opens the eyes of the blind, only to cry...to cry...
No one comprehends our symbols, our gestures of love
No one understands the caged dove in our words
Dove of clouds and night
From cloud to cloud, from night to night
We hold at the door the long awaited the return of your eyes
We look into that hole, where those who are unborn move and dance...
That hole where the stare of the blind remain stable
It's to be able to cry, it's to be able to cry
because the tears must rain over the cheeks of the afternoon...
It is to cry that this life is so short
It is to cry that this life is so long...
J-Lopez...
Wednesday, January 13, 2010
Thursday, January 7, 2010
Mestizo
The holidays are dreadful. He can’t stand the humid stench of the home of her parents, the cold and pale light of their den, nor the inevitable fruit cake on Christmas Eve. She hated his parents’ vegetarian menu and the pounding of his brothers’ and sisters’ shoes while dancing on the wooden platform of their back yard every New Years Eve. Both families contemplated with disdain: “what hybrid monsters will this couple, against all of nature’s laws, give birth if they are of centaur and mermaid?”
J-Lopez(Dario Mariategui)
Tijuana
1.7.10
J-Lopez(Dario Mariategui)
Tijuana
1.7.10
Wednesday, January 6, 2010
Underwater Voices
He began to lose touch with everything that was real. Around him was nothing, everything remained still.
An inexplicable sense of peace filled the place. How he got there a total mystery. All he knew was that it was a beautiful sensation.
Suddenly he heard voices, voices that seemed to be underwater, muffled, far away. Please…don’t go… It was her voice. He could not mistake it. He then began to feel an unstoppable buzzing in his head and felt vibrations all over his body. His eyes became milky white and everything blurred. He did not want to leave nor go back to the world he used to live in; he never made such a great effort to live.
His body called out to him but there was no turning back. He felt like a ship sailing a deep black sea where his sorrows rained down incessantly, his weaknesses became gigantic waves, and his fears strong winds intended on sinking his vessel.
By leaving no one would ever be able to bother him. They would all wait for a response but they knew it wouldn’t come.
We’re losing him, he could hear a watery voice say.
What would people think now if he opened his eyes? He would have wanted people to understand him, that he was passing through a portal where all of his dreams oscillated between the real and the illusory as he waited to cross the bridge of death. He hoped his mind would make a decision so that he could take the next step.
I love you…, he heard her say. Those three words bounced around his brain, shook his body, and froze his soul causing an effect he was not prepared for. Now he missed her, his wife, and being with her was the only thing keeping him alive. He missed her smile, her green eyes, her dark brown hair covering her velvet shoulders, the ethereal embrace of her slender arms, and the glorious touch of her full lips.
It was too late. There was nothing that could be done. He then felt an icy hand drag him out of the room where the voices became harder and harder to hear.
J-Lopez (Dario Mariategui)
San Diego
1.6.10
An inexplicable sense of peace filled the place. How he got there a total mystery. All he knew was that it was a beautiful sensation.
Suddenly he heard voices, voices that seemed to be underwater, muffled, far away. Please…don’t go… It was her voice. He could not mistake it. He then began to feel an unstoppable buzzing in his head and felt vibrations all over his body. His eyes became milky white and everything blurred. He did not want to leave nor go back to the world he used to live in; he never made such a great effort to live.
His body called out to him but there was no turning back. He felt like a ship sailing a deep black sea where his sorrows rained down incessantly, his weaknesses became gigantic waves, and his fears strong winds intended on sinking his vessel.
By leaving no one would ever be able to bother him. They would all wait for a response but they knew it wouldn’t come.
We’re losing him, he could hear a watery voice say.
What would people think now if he opened his eyes? He would have wanted people to understand him, that he was passing through a portal where all of his dreams oscillated between the real and the illusory as he waited to cross the bridge of death. He hoped his mind would make a decision so that he could take the next step.
I love you…, he heard her say. Those three words bounced around his brain, shook his body, and froze his soul causing an effect he was not prepared for. Now he missed her, his wife, and being with her was the only thing keeping him alive. He missed her smile, her green eyes, her dark brown hair covering her velvet shoulders, the ethereal embrace of her slender arms, and the glorious touch of her full lips.
It was too late. There was nothing that could be done. He then felt an icy hand drag him out of the room where the voices became harder and harder to hear.
J-Lopez (Dario Mariategui)
San Diego
1.6.10
Monday, January 4, 2010
Moonshine
…I want to know where you are so I may know where to go…those were the only words that I pretended clothe my reasons and have them guide the solitary steps of my feet; and without having realized I had reached that point. I had come to proverbial crossroad in life, the one you stand on the edge of. On one side you see the water that runs smooth and sometimes tumultuous and violent and on the other a slightly perceptible and unknown road, aimless, with multiple textures and movements.
I feel my frozen feet and the torrent of water splashes on me, it stirs my fears and dampens the wounds suffered along the way. It is easy to submerge oneself in it and to fuse with its molecules. However, the dying light of the road steals me away from the hypnotizing coming and going of the stream.
This road is as lonely as the void that has nested in my eyes but the light that pierces it comes from the moon above, a lost flash of the pure and unknown enigma that implies the whole spirit of celestial body.
…and in a delicate whisper, nameless, it makes me walk…one…two…three..four steps to soothe me under the warmth of its magic so as to allow me to perceive the totality of my senses. In celestial worship every pore of my skin breathes on its own, every cell and drop of blood move in complete harmony until they have reached the infinite and unknown space of the universe. I don’t need any sort of clothes to feel protected but the climax of this supreme freedom and beauty is temporary and once again leaves this lonely road in darkness and earthly uncertainty…
I’m not too far. I can still run and dive into the water but my soul yearns for that moon beam that keeps my hopes alive and I know that if I stay I will be withering away the body that envelops my reason and my spirit would be so free that I can partake of its intensity. How many strings pull at my toes and hands and feet? Perhaps that is why I’m cold, because I have failed to visualize and desire the fire that shall consume me in a single breath, in an instant and in a flash…
J-Lopez (Dario Mariategui)
San Diego
1.4.10
I feel my frozen feet and the torrent of water splashes on me, it stirs my fears and dampens the wounds suffered along the way. It is easy to submerge oneself in it and to fuse with its molecules. However, the dying light of the road steals me away from the hypnotizing coming and going of the stream.
This road is as lonely as the void that has nested in my eyes but the light that pierces it comes from the moon above, a lost flash of the pure and unknown enigma that implies the whole spirit of celestial body.
…and in a delicate whisper, nameless, it makes me walk…one…two…three..four steps to soothe me under the warmth of its magic so as to allow me to perceive the totality of my senses. In celestial worship every pore of my skin breathes on its own, every cell and drop of blood move in complete harmony until they have reached the infinite and unknown space of the universe. I don’t need any sort of clothes to feel protected but the climax of this supreme freedom and beauty is temporary and once again leaves this lonely road in darkness and earthly uncertainty…
I’m not too far. I can still run and dive into the water but my soul yearns for that moon beam that keeps my hopes alive and I know that if I stay I will be withering away the body that envelops my reason and my spirit would be so free that I can partake of its intensity. How many strings pull at my toes and hands and feet? Perhaps that is why I’m cold, because I have failed to visualize and desire the fire that shall consume me in a single breath, in an instant and in a flash…
J-Lopez (Dario Mariategui)
San Diego
1.4.10
Saturday, January 2, 2010
To Roam the Desert
He had always wanted to be human. His search led him to a mortal to which he would commend the whole universe. Perhaps his inexplicable indifference to bear the weight of the heavens had now made him a castaway on earth.
He walked for forty days, in what he feared to be a circular trajectory, until he found himself at a maze of water to submerge himself in. The horizon told him there was no end in sight. Still, he had to find the man he had wished to be. Perhaps the fluttering of the wings of a butterfly had brought upon him that hurricane leaving him shipwrecked and unconscious. That night he awoke in a fortress of stone.
They will think I’m insane, a liar, he thought but he could bare it no more and upon raising his voice he let out words into the air that captivated the citizens’ curiosity. They gave him ink and paper to drown his insanity. However, his words reached the whole world.
It will exceed fantasy until it becomes absurd, he thought again. Soon enough they called upon him, orientated him, and gave him supplies and advise on conquering the desert, that place sought out by so many religious leaders as something not to escape, but as a place to find themselves.
He spent about a century or more wandering the wilderness and all its abstract essence, chimerical horizons, and infinite skies. He had gone past the threshold of which he had been warned where, in the deepness of the desert, time is nothing more but an attempt to make death short and the waiting long while fusing together present, past, and future in a single breath.
Having heeded that advice he roamed the emptiness without finding what he sought to find. He lay tired and skeptical, perhaps disappointed. The desert waited for another anxious wanderer.
J-Lopez (Dario Mariategui)
San Diego
1.2.10
He walked for forty days, in what he feared to be a circular trajectory, until he found himself at a maze of water to submerge himself in. The horizon told him there was no end in sight. Still, he had to find the man he had wished to be. Perhaps the fluttering of the wings of a butterfly had brought upon him that hurricane leaving him shipwrecked and unconscious. That night he awoke in a fortress of stone.
They will think I’m insane, a liar, he thought but he could bare it no more and upon raising his voice he let out words into the air that captivated the citizens’ curiosity. They gave him ink and paper to drown his insanity. However, his words reached the whole world.
It will exceed fantasy until it becomes absurd, he thought again. Soon enough they called upon him, orientated him, and gave him supplies and advise on conquering the desert, that place sought out by so many religious leaders as something not to escape, but as a place to find themselves.
He spent about a century or more wandering the wilderness and all its abstract essence, chimerical horizons, and infinite skies. He had gone past the threshold of which he had been warned where, in the deepness of the desert, time is nothing more but an attempt to make death short and the waiting long while fusing together present, past, and future in a single breath.
Having heeded that advice he roamed the emptiness without finding what he sought to find. He lay tired and skeptical, perhaps disappointed. The desert waited for another anxious wanderer.
J-Lopez (Dario Mariategui)
San Diego
1.2.10
Echos are liars...
At first you will not them to be very happy; that seems to be everyone’s impression. Soon you will see that they share the same faces, the same dialogues. It’s quite unnerving, the constant repetition, but remember that you are buried in a valley, surrounded by mountains and paths that allow the echo to propagate itself and you may lose yourself in the intense heat.
In time, it will all make sense. It’s difficult to conform to the idea that no one is alive and that this place is far too dead. But for a while now the living have lived as if they would never die and that is why they are so hard to find. Even harder now that they devour themselves.
The echos are liars…iars…iars…
J-Lopez (Dario Mariategui)
San Diego
1.2.10
In time, it will all make sense. It’s difficult to conform to the idea that no one is alive and that this place is far too dead. But for a while now the living have lived as if they would never die and that is why they are so hard to find. Even harder now that they devour themselves.
The echos are liars…iars…iars…
J-Lopez (Dario Mariategui)
San Diego
1.2.10
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